20 Comments
Aug 16·edited Aug 16Liked by Barry Friedman

Barry's a TEDtalker? Way cool! Also very worthwhile. I am so glad the last words exchanged between my late wife wife and me - as it turned out, in her last day here - was her pulling me close so she could whisper in my ear (as loud as she could talk by then) and telling me she forgave me for everything and loved me, and me saying the same back to her. There was nothing left to say or do, and when the phone rang shortly after midnight, and I knew why, I felt joy that she'd escaped the worst that was coming.

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Seems to me you and your wife got more than just this last minute right.

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Aug 17Liked by Barry Friedman

My wife in her last few hours did much the same for me, pulling me close, telling me I was loved. She then lapsed back into a deep sleep and didn't awaken again. I was able to be holding her when she took that last breath.

Thank you, Barry for this talk, for your books and your friendship.

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Aug 16Liked by Barry Friedman

Thank you Barry. Beautifully done

When my sister diec, not too long ago, I was at her deathbed and knrw she was not ready. She had just had her hair done and s brand new manicure. And that's when i cried. But then I realized she would have been pleased to look spiffy in those last hours. Still the beauty

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The "not ready" is a dynamic I don't know what to do with. And I think you're right. If you're not ready, at least always look your best while being unprepared.

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Aug 16Liked by Barry Friedman

Beautifully done, Barry. It was nice to watch again. And my eyes are leaking again.

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Thank you, Susan. You've seen this before?

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I watched most of the livestream because I couldn't be there in person.

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That's right! YOU were the person who saw the livestream

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I've read the books, actually shared a meal with Barry, and I'm sitting here leaky eyed, almost twenty years after my wife passed away. Barry's writing often does that to me.

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And a great meal it was. And a lovely, lovely sentiment.

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Great perspective. Sometimes, I have found, friends affect you more than family. Or even extended family. I loved "The Wonder Years" analogy. Your dad and your son. I'm about three-quarters of the way through book two. It's funny and heartbreaking at the same time, because you can see how much he's slowly falling into the darkness. I never got to say good-bye to my dad. My mom, who knows? She'll be 88 soon. I told my niece a few years back, if your dad, aunt or I die before she does, she wouldn't last long. Then again my aunt buried her son, husband and granddaughter before she passed. So, who knows in this life, that's the mystery of it.

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I appreciate this, and you're right about the second book. It's funny but you know it's coming. And Jack Sh*t 3, which I'm finishing up, it comes -- it's here. As people get older, it seems like we all stage our own dress rehearsal in preparation for their death.

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I never got to say goodbye to my Dad, either. The morning I was going to go visit him, his wife called to let me know he had just died while starting the fire in the stove. We never know when our switch is going to get flipped, so we need to take advantage of every minute we've got left

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Aug 16Liked by Barry Friedman

Thank you for that. You have a gift, and I'm glad and amazed when you share it.

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This is a wonderful thing to say to someone. I'll give you 48 hours to take it back or I'm making it a book blurb some day.

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Feel free to use it. Just don't attribute it to me, OK? I have a reputation to uphold.

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Aug 16Liked by Barry Friedman

Bravo! Lovely.

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Thank you, June

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Aug 17Liked by Barry Friedman

Thank you, Barry

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